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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24138655">i love you, idiot.</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/euphoricflores/pseuds/euphoricflores'>euphoricflores</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>NCT (Band)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Bottom Huang Ren Jun, Day At The Beach, Dom/sub Undertones, Established Relationship, Fluff and Humor, Hotel Sex, Huang Ren Jun is Whipped, Kinda, Lee Donghyuck | Haechan is Whipped, Light Angst, Lots of it, M/M, Shower Sex, Top Lee Donghyuck | Haechan, communication is key, lots of stupid jokes, mainly haechan, renjun is an overthinker</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-05-12</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-05-12</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-02 17:53:26</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Explicit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>10,475</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24138655</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/euphoricflores/pseuds/euphoricflores</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>based on the dreamie’s beach trip video while in Đà Nẵng. </p><p>a very self indulgent writing of haechan and renjun learning to communicate and learning how to say i love you. the angst is very light and there’s a lot of comfort, it’s a little tooth rottening. also a lot of stupid humor because that’s how renhyuck rolls.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Huang Ren Jun/Lee Donghyuck | Haechan</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>30</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>206</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>i love you, idiot.</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>this was written over the course of like... since quarantine started here and my motivation just kept dying because being cooped at home is ruining my mental health. but i finally finished it but i’m not very happy with the ending but i just wanted to finish it and post it before it kept bugging me haha. </p><p>if there’s typos or points where the grammar is off, that’s entirely on me since i didn’t give it a last full read, plus this was all written and posted on my phone haha. i’ll fix things once i get college stuff out of the way. </p><p>in the meantime, enjoy!!</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>in moments such as now, renjun was able to see how haechan’s nickname suited him all too well. </p><p>he was the first of the six to kick off his shoes, trailing sand in his wake as he made a beeline towards the ocean shore. the only member to follow him was jaemin along his camera, but even he wasn’t as amped up as the eccentric boy was. any opportunity that haechan was given to play under the sun coupled with some sort of water source, it was probably the most euphoric version of him that renjun could possibly see, which spoke levels since haechan was already a very happy-go-lucky person in general. </p><p>renjun watched along with the others, expecting haechan to launch himself into the water immediately. however, the younger surprisingly skidded to a halt right before he could do just that. before anybody knew it, he turned around abruptly and began to run back, leaving behind a confused jaemin at the shore.</p><p>“oh, he’s definitely gonna make someone go in with him.” jeno laughed nervously from behind renjun. </p><p>“i volunteer jisung.” chenle grinned towards the youngest who gave him an offended look at the way he was trying to  involuntarily volunteer him.</p><p>“do you see those giant waves? definitely not. nope.” jisung backed up, large palms raised in front of him in defense. “i’m also in jeans. i didn’t bring swim trunks.” </p><p>renjun blocked out the two youngest as they began a small quarrel, focusing on haechan’s approaching figure. unsurprisingly, he went straight to him and jeno. he looked jittery from excitement. </p><p>“jump in with me.” he demanded to no one in particular, looking between the two oldest members. </p><p>before renjun could open his mouth, he felt himself get pushed forward towards haechan, bumping into him. he flashed a glare over his shoulder at jeno who was smiling way too big and way too mischievously, eyes turned to crescents. brat. </p><p>“ding, ding, ding! injunnie is the winner.” haechan exclaimed. without warning, he grabbed renjun’s wrist and began tugging him to the water. “let’s go before you change your mind.” </p><p>“as if i even had the option to begin with.” renjun huffed, tugging his hand out of haechan’s grasp. “let me take off my shoes first.” </p><p>haechan whined impatiently. “you should have already been ready. all of you guys should be ready to go in the water but nooo, you’re all lame.” </p><p>“it’s okay, you’ve got renjun-hyung. per usual.” chenle wiggled his brows. he earned a light slap to his arm from jisung, the maknae wordlessly telling him to shut up since they did have their manager and stylists around them.</p><p>“oh, that is noted! watch your ass, chenle.” haechan laughed passively, narrowing his eyes. </p><p>chenle merely stuck out his tongue.</p><p>“both of you shut up. come on, haechan.” renjun placed his shoes beneath one of the beach chairs before grabbing haechan’s hand. he threaded his fingers through his, tugging the younger along till he was walking alongside him. </p><p>“i’m throwing him in the water later.” haechan seemed to promise once they walked off. he squeezed renjun's hand to punctuate his sentence. “all three of them.” </p><p>“at the same time?” renjun asked. </p><p>“yes.” </p><p>“i’d like to see that.” </p><p>haechan nodded, eyes squinted as a salty ocean breeze welcomed them. “i’ll do it.” then, catching renjun completely off guard, he broke out into a run. “now let’s finally go before i get a heat stroke!” </p><p>renjun stumbled a bit before matching haechan’s pace. before he could protest that haechan didn’t warn him, the other boy bawled into the air, not stopping his obnoxious screaming until the two threw themselves into the water. piercing cold welcomed renjun in a not-so welcoming embrace. swallowed up by a few waves, it took a few moments until renjun was able to resurface. gasping for air and blinded with his own water heavy bangs, renjun wasn’t able to see where haechan was in the midst of the water, only able to hear his whole-hearted laughter tearing through the air. he brushed back his bangs with a hand, suddenly greeted with haechan’s beaming face a few feet away. he was glowing.</p><p>“i think i almost drowned.” renjun said, teeth chattering a bit. his nostrils burned and the taste of salt was attacking his senses now too.</p><p>“me too.” haechan chuckled. “but we did it together.” </p><p>renjun scrunched his nose at that. “how romantic.” </p><p>“rose and jack have nothing on us.” </p><p>“stop.” renjun gasped, but the laughs that tumbled out of his mouth afterwards betrayed him. “that's so bad, haechan.”</p><p>haechan drifted to renjun with his only response being a prod at his cheek with his finger. he then used said finger to point at jaemin at the shoreline, the white haired boy’s face hidden behind his hefty camera as he took photos of the two. </p><p>“paparazzi always following us, even on vacation.” haechan sighed, disappointed. “no pictures, please! i’m just trying to enjoy my honeymoon with my husband.” </p><p>jaemin looked over from behind the camera. he narrowed his eyes before flipping haechan the bird and returning to taking photos. when jaemin was in his photographer mentality, he spared no one when it came to their shenanigans that could affect him in his zone. especially when it came to haechan, his resistance to the older's bullshit was usually at its maximum capacity.</p><p>renjun looked at haechan after jaemin’s response. “you’re just gonna take that?” </p><p>haechan blinked a few times. “i honestly wasn’t expecting that response so i’m just gonna pretend it didn’t happen.” </p><p>“oh, don’t worry.” renjun brushed back haechan’s hair, slicking it back so he could see his face better. haechan rarely ever had his hair parted and frankly, renjun was a little disappointed with that reality. he liked seeing haechan’s face. without his bangs, renjun could see the twinkle of his eyes better and the cute furrow in his brows whenever he was focused or annoyed. “i’ll throw him in the water for you.” </p><p>haechan looked up at the oldest and smiled, unaware of his little reverie brewing in his brain.  “i don’t know why we don’t cooperate more often. our minds are too powerful.” </p><p>“cause you’re a brat.” renjun crooned. beneath the surface, his hand found haechan's calloused one once more and he returned them to how they were before haechan threw them into the water. “anyways, are you going to get chenle in the water or not? you’ve gotta get at least one of them in here.” </p><p>haechan's eyes crinkled at the corners as he smiled bigger. he parted his lips as if he were going to comment on their hands, but the only thing that came out was a thoughtful hum. he turned his head away to look at the other members. “i think i could get jeno.” </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>—</p><p> </p><p> </p><p>haechan failed, much to no one’s surprise. there wasn’t much point in trying to get jaemin either since he voluntarily went into the water after getting a decent amount of photos. they were mainly of renjun since he was jaemin’s usual go-to member for his photo shoots and because haechan spent more time today tormenting the other member’s rather than staying still in the water. his only success at getting back at chenle was unintentionally knocking his coconut drink right out of his hands during their mid air jump photo for their twitter, and even then haechan felt guilty. </p><p>their beach day had commenced after a few hours and they returned back to their hotel with grainy shoes and new hair styles given by the persistent ocean winds. at the mention of them having no more scheduled activities for the day from their managers, all of the teenagers had immediately gone into their designated rooms with their roommates. if they needed one another, no doubt they would send a text rather than knock on their door. </p><p>the room assignment situation was based on rock, paper, scissors which was the dreamies' deciding factor on pretty much anything. it was always ruthless, intense, and spared no one, but by some struck of luck, renjun and haechan ended up together. while most would figure that was an unlucky result, both they and their members knew it was the opposite in reality. the snickers and dramatic exclamations from the other members was a reaction haechan joined in on just to see the embarrassed flush tinted on renjun’s cheeks. </p><p>“rock, paper, scissors on who gets to shower first.” was the first thing haechan said once they entered their room. </p><p>renjun followed after him, feet dragging, exhaustion weakening his bones. he didn’t reply for a few moments, more focused on his tragic appearance in the hallway mirror. though he prided himself on being confident with his bare face, sometimes he was hit with realistic insecurity. </p><p>“or we could just shower together. save time, save water.” renjun half jokingly said, moving along from his mirror inspection and brushing past haechan to get to his travel bag on ‘his’ bed. aka, the lone bed that they were not using at all and had stripped the pillows from to use on the other bed which the two actually were using. </p><p>“woah.” haechan gaped open his mouth. “sounds a little scandalous to me, injun. sounds like you want more than just a shower.” </p><p>“would that be so terrible?” renjun shot back. “as if you’d complain, anyways.” </p><p>haechan snickered. “you’re not wrong.” he turned on his heel, heading towards their bathroom. “i’ll get the water warm, then.” </p><p>by the time renjun had collected clothes for him to wear once out of the shower, he entered the bathroom which was already a bit steamy. the younger was already inside, humming a tune he couldn’t quite make out. </p><p>haechan always liked his showers scorching and renjun would have complained if he wasn’t still damp and cold from the ocean. a hot shower was something he was desiring. </p><p>“injunnie~” haechan sang once he heard feet padding into the bathroom. his silhouette danced from behind the distorted glass door.</p><p>renjun smiled softly at that. “i’m coming.” he replied in a small voice, mostly due to his tiredness. </p><p>his clothes clung to him like he was wearing a body suit and after each garment of clothing he stripped off he felt a rain of sand adorn it and decorate the floor with the specks. once he was fully nude, he slid open the glass door and stepped inside. </p><p>“there you are.” haechan reached out almost immediately and brought renjun to him by his small waist. “shorty.” </p><p>renjun rolled his eyes but was a little too tired to comment back. he scrunched his nose as he was pulled under the rain of water, unprepared but also welcoming the warmth. his hands took purchase on the curve of haechan’s chest, bouncing a bit on his toes to be face to face with the taller boy. he gave haechan a soft kiss, tasting salt and coconut water. </p><p>haechan, both taken aback and already expectant of renjun to initiate something (but not so soon), took a moment to process the action. as renjun pulled away to check on him and his lack of reaction, haechan quickly chased his lips and brought renjun back to him while simultaneously holding him tighter. renjun tensed up for a moment out of surprise before relaxing, practically melting into haechan’s arms. he sighed in contentment. </p><p>renjun’s fingers loosely played with the nape of haechan’s neck where his hair was growing a little long and from there he reached up higher and higher till he could take a handful of mahogany hair. renjun gently pulled them apart in a light grip on his hair, enough for him to see haechan’s half lidded eyes. </p><p>“lean your head down a little.” renjun said in the midst of another kiss that haechan delved into. he seemed to not hear renjun’s quiet command, mind focused on other things already rather than their shower. “hey. hey, baby. come back to me for a second.” </p><p>at that, haechan quickly stopped. he looked down at renjun with wide eyes, attention completely dead set on the other now. he looked like a puppy. </p><p>renjun knew the word was an easy way to get haechan alert, especially since renjun only ever said it when it was just the two of them alone. renjun was never one to give pet names, but haechan was the complete opposite. so hearing the other say it was always a pleasant surprise. almost a little foreign to hear. </p><p>“yeah?” haechan murmured, embarrassed. </p><p>“can i shampoo your hair?” renjun asked, though he was already reaching for the bottle in the caddy behind haechan. uncapping the bottle, renjun squeezed a small amount onto the center of his palm. </p><p>haechan bowed his head in response, shuddering a bit as renjun ran his fingers through his hair, nails lightly scratching his scalp. he kept his hands on renjun’s waist to keep them both steady and close despite the shower already being rather small. not that renjun would ever admit it outloud, but he probably enjoyed it a little too much whenever haechan held him in a nature that was close to possessive. it was ridiculous, but the feeling he got from it was always indescribable. it just made his stomach fuzzy. </p><p>“so much sand.” renjun chuckled as he styled haechan’s hair up, giving him small devil horns. “did you spend more time in the ocean or on land?”</p><p>“i was determined to get someone into the water.” haechan explained, eyes shutting as the shampoo pricked at them. he opened his palm in the gap between him and renjun, silently asking for shampoo. renjun took a moment to figure out what he wanted before complying. </p><p>haechan blindly reached for renjun’s hair, almost missing if renjun hadn’t moved his head. he returned the favor and scrubbed the shampoo into renjun’s dark locks, mimicking renjun’s movements. </p><p>“but i’m tired now. i thought i’d have more energy since we don’t have a schedule for today. but i think everything is catching up to me and i just don’t want to do anything.” haechan explained, brushing back renjun’s hair till it was all slicked back. he cracked open one eye to look at renjun and his exposed forehead before laughing airily through his nostrils. </p><p>renjun pursed his lips, winking. “do i look good?” </p><p>“always,” haechan grinned. then, in a softer, gentler voice,“you’re the cutest, injunnie.” </p><p>renjun puffed his cheeks, his turn to be embarrassed now at haechan’s words. “good thing i’m tired too. we don’t have to exert ourselves today.” he decided to continue on with the original topic. he was awkward with compliments, anyways. haechan knew it meant a lot more to him than what he was expressing. </p><p>“i’ll be happy just to lay in bed with you and watch movies.” renjun said. “ok, let’s wash out the suds.” </p><p>haechan let renjun guide them back under the water, squeezing his eyes tighter as renjun thoroughly removed the shampoo out of his hair. he brought renjun under with him, working his own hands through the smaller boy’s hair and hearing him make a small noise of protest. </p><p>once haechan was able to open his eyes freely without shampoo burning them, he grabbed the liquid body wash. with a small murmur of command under his breath, he turned renjun around so his back was to him, drizzling the liquid onto his palm. </p><p>renjun shivered as haechan put his palm flat on his back with the cold liquid. it ran down his spine steadily, but haechan was quick on distributing it throughout the expanse of renjun’s shoulders and back. he sucked in a sharp breath as he felt haechan’s lips on the nape of his neck, followed by the other boy crowding in closer to him. his palms pressed on the cold shower wall to keep him upright. </p><p>“haechan.” renjun sighed. he let haechan suckle at where his neck met his shoulder, finding it hard to focus with how much his hands were roaming. “no marks.” </p><p>“mark is not here.” haechan replied, smile evident even in his voice. </p><p>renjun reached back and pinched haechan’s tummy. haechan yelped. </p><p>“that was a shitty joke.” renjun tried to say, but small laughs laced his words and haechan wondered the legitimacy and seriousness behind his judgement. </p><p>“oh but you’re laughing.” haechan pressed his chest back to renjun’s back, wrapping his arms around the smaller boy’s middle. he ran a soap slicked hand across renjun’s toned stomach, fingers tracing his hipbones. “one mark won’t hurt.”</p><p>“we have concept shooting next week.” renjun warned. he shifted in his spot as haechan made his way to the inners of his thighs, pushing them apart. he tried to focus on talking, but haechan’s hands were getting dangerously close. “i’ll have to hide it. that’s a lot of work, you know…”</p><p>haechan hummed. “i’ll put it somewhere not obvious.” he gave his thigh a squeeze. “right here?” his other hand held his hip after feeling renjun’s legs start to shake ever so slightly. “or here.” </p><p>renjun rested his head on the wall, huffing at the feeling of haechan jr pressing up hard against his ass. not that he was any better, his increasing hard on was starting to get more uncomfortable the more haechan touched him anywhere but where he needed it. all thoughts of his creeping exhaustion from the last few day’s events were seeping away, replaced with neediness. </p><p>“donghyuck.” renjun croaked out, hating the desperation thick in his voice. “please tell me you brought a condom.” </p><p>the grip on his hip tightened at the question. he heard haechan swallow by his ear. “y-yeah. i think i brought one or two.” he admitted. “i didn’t know if we’d even have time.” </p><p>“we have time now.” renjun seethed through his teeth as haechan’s hand smoothed over the curve of his ass. “just— just…” </p><p>impatient now, renjun turned himself around so he was facing haechan again. he adjusted so both their cocks were aligned together, wrapping one of his hands around them. haechan’s was longer, thicker in its width compared to renjun’s and his smaller hand was finding it hard to wrap around the two of them. haechan sucked in a harsh breath as the change of position and at renjun’s hand struggling. </p><p>“i just need something right now, please.” renjun almost whispered as if afraid someone would hear. he groaned as haechan wrapped his own hand around renjun’s, getting a better grip than he previously was and intensifying the pressure. </p><p>“i know, it’s okay.” haechan eased whilst already guiding their hands up and down their cocks. the glide was slippery, evidently, but with haechan applying enough of a grip for the two of them it was easy to get a steady rhythm going. </p><p>renjun breathed hard, trying not to moan. haechan, however, let small whimpers tumble from his lips, always the more shameless of the two. he had his forehead resting against renjun’s, faces only a couple inches apart so renjun could see the furrow of his brows and the way his lips pursed into o’s as he moaned softly. and that made it harder for renjun to keep himself composed. </p><p>with a swipe of his own thumb, renjun gave the head of haechan’s cock some attention, breaking away from their unified rhythm they had developed. at that, haechan’s stuttered his movements and moaned loudly. </p><p>“renjun, a-ah.” haechan quickly burrowed his face into the crook of renjun’s shoulder, muffling himself as renjun repeated his movement again and again. </p><p>renjun took his other hand and placed it on haechan’s, switching their placements as he guided haechan to continue stroking. his other hand continued to focus on haechan’s head, though he eventually gave it a rest the more haechan’s body shook with tremors. that was a thorough indication that renjun was only quickening his climax, and renjun didn’t want him reaching that so early when they both clearly wanted something more fulfilling and not anything rushed.</p><p>it was nostalgic, really. renjun could recall the early days of their relationship which heavily consisted of make out sessions and sneaking into the other’s room to rub one out. as previously stated, haechan had always been the more bold one of pair, initiating both their first kiss and their first time having intercourse. though, over time as renjun learned to develop his own confidence in the sheets and growing accustomed to what made  haechan grow weak,  renjun could recall moments where haechan became the more timid one just by the smallest gestures or words. </p><p>one of those very early moments of their relationship had renjun working himself up into a nervous tizzy to the point where he avoided haechan for probably three days. those three days were mutually painful and perplexing and before renjun could make it a fourth day, haechan had locked them both in the dance practice room before renjun could escape. </p><p>“are you ashamed of us?” haechan murmured. he had renjun cornered against him and the wall, the two slick with sweat and smelling unpleasantly. it was so humid.</p><p>“no.” renjun hung his head, resting it on haechan’s shoulder. he felt dizzy from the previous hours of exertion, even more so with haechan so close, his smell surrounding him. three days felt like three years and having haechan finally near him was strange. “this just doesn’t feel real. i’m just really confused.”  </p><p>haechan held the back of his head, allowing him to stay there. his heartbeat was rapid against the cage of his chest and he wondered if renjun could hear its loud pulsing. “i really like you, renjun.” </p><p>renjun tensed, not expecting him to say that so suddenly. he felt a loss for words for a few beats before quietly replying back.</p><p>“i really like you too, haechan.” </p><p>“yeah? you can’t fake that, renjun. you can’t fake feelings.” </p><p>that was really all haechan needed to say for renjun to cling to him, hold him tight until his knuckles turned white. </p><p>but, they always settled for like. not that there was anything wrong with that. they both knew they meant more than that word and haechan liked to teasingly say he loved renjun, but it was always shrugged off since haechan said that to just about everyone. they were together for maybe close to a year and haechan and him never thought anything of it. or at least none of them ever said anything about it. renjun thought about it. almost slipped a few times.</p><p>“haechanie, can we go to the bed?” renjun managed to ask through a shaky voice, letting go of their dicks and reaching up to pull haechan off him. </p><p>he heard haechan whimper at the loss of touch and gingerly caressed his bottom lip with a thumb. “let’s get dry, alright?” renjun soothingly said, pulling his mature hyung card out. </p><p>they were both in a touch starved state, especially haechan since he was busy juggling both 127 and dream promotions. renjun tried to satisfy his needs whenever he wasn’t busy radio hosting, but even then it compared to nothing without haechan who, with such a compact schedule, had little to no time to even think about doing that. the latter easily lost composure and crumbled whenever serious time gaps interfered with the two and right now was one of those times. </p><p>haechan nodded, reaching back and shutting off the water. almost immediately he felt renjun drape a towel over his head, already ruffling his damp hair and drying it out as much as the towel would allow. once deemed good enough, he was able to see again through the mess of his bangs and was greeted with renjun doing the same to his own hair. </p><p>it was quiet while they dried eachother off, though renjun yelped and broke the silence as soon as haechan leaned down and hoisted the older up into his arms. before he knew it, haechan carried him out of the bathroom and back out to the bedroom. </p><p>“haechan!” renjun gasped, holding onto the other boy tightly. despite already being used to such antics and half-expecting to be thrown onto the bed, he was met with gentle care as haechan slowly brought the both of them down onto the unused bed. </p><p>renjun sunk into the mattress, looking up at haechan with wide eyes as the other greeted him with a charming smile. it was short lived as haechan slid off the bed and went to his own travel bag, fishing through its contents before he pulled out a condom. he raised it into the air like it was a medal, triumphant. </p><p>“why are you so proud?” renjun laughed, head tossing back. seeing haechan be fully nude with a total hard on while doing that pose was something renjun didn’t think he’d ever see. “come here.” </p><p>haechan rejoined renjun and placed the condom beside them. he wasn’t planning on using it quite yet, anyways. </p><p>“because i lowkey thought i lost it or actually forgot it. would have had to run to the nearest pharmacy otherwise.” haechan admitted, nosing renjun’s cheek. </p><p>“oh, you would do that for me?” </p><p>“who said i would have been the one to go?” </p><p>renjun scowled, slapping haechan’s ass hard. he snorted as haechan faked an exaggerated moan, the noise heavy on renjun’s eardrums since his mouth was right by his ear. </p><p>“wow, we might have just discovered a new kink, injun.” haechan breathed heavily just to hear renjun explode into another fit of laughter. “again!” </p><p>“no, weirdo!” renjun tried to push haechan off him. haechan was much stronger than him though and he trapped renjun in his arms, fingers jabbing into his sides in the process. renjun writhed under him, laughs filling the room and reverberating off the walls. </p><p>“stop! s-stop— AHA— i can’t breathe, haechan!” renjun pleaded through chortles. </p><p>thankfully, after what felt like minutes of tickling (which was really only a few seconds), haechan quit it and lounged back on his legs to give renjun space to regather himself. in doing so, haechan was able to see renjun’s reddened face, a light sheen of sweat (or shower water) illuminated on his forehead from the soft lights of their hotel room.</p><p>haechan let a few last laughs tumble from his mouth before he crawled back over renjun. it provoked the smaller boy to flinch, palms raised defensively in case haechan decided to attack him again. </p><p>“i’m done i promise.” haechan laced his fingers through one of renjun’s open palms, bringing it to his lips. he kissed renjun’s knuckles. </p><p>“i was laughing way too loud, donghyuck.” renjun whined, but his words trailed off a bit at haechan’s lips. “you shouldn’t have…”</p><p>haechan hummed in question, noticing renjun’s sudden fascination in his current gesture. </p><p>“have what?” </p><p>renjun swallowed a lump that formed in his throat. “nothing. you just always make me lose my train of thought.” he half lied. haechan did distract him a lot, but not in a negative way.</p><p>haechan furrowed his brows at that. “hey.” </p><p>renjun took his hand away from haechan and instead placed it on haechan’s cheek. “because you’re so handsome.” he smiled lopsidedly. </p><p>haechan gasped. “you think so?” he asked in mild disbelief. “what else?” </p><p>“what else what?” </p><p>haechan rolled his eyes. “what else about me makes you so distracted that you lose your train of thought? me being hot is a given, duh.” </p><p>renjun huffed. haechan giggled and kissed his pout away in a silent way of telling him he was joking. </p><p>“i think you do that to me too.” haechan filled the small silence as renjun began to ponder. or figure out a way to deflect haechan’s question. </p><p>“i do?” renjun seemed a little too surprised for haechan’s liking. it was then haechan was becoming reminded of their lack of labels and maybe even lack of communication. renjun should already know how much of an impact he had on him. </p><p>“of course. everyday, renjun. even on days when we don’t see each other. i could be across the world and i’ll still be clouded with thoughts of you.” haechan spoke soft, similarly to how he did in the shower. but with their change of environment and position, it seemed way more raw and intimate now. it was always easier for them both to be cheeky rather than vulnerable.</p><p>renjun inhaled sharply as haechan smoothed his hands down his slender body, touch awakening his sensitivity again. his palms were a little colder now since they left the shower and goosebumps began to protrude over every inch of renjun’s skin because of it. </p><p>“i think about your smile. your laugh plays in my head a lot whenever something funny happens and you’re not there. even if it’s totally not something you’d laugh at.” haechan interrupted his own talking to calm renjun’s trembling body with a kiss. “how your single dimple shows up more when you laugh harder.” </p><p>renjun choked out a whimper, feeling even more hot at the excessive attention. he shuddered as haechan lowered down to his chest, planting petal kisses along it. the rise and fall of his chest had regained its regular rhythm after haechan’s sudden tickling, but it seemed to regress back to it again the more haechan continued. </p><p>“your voice is something i think about an unhealthy amount. not even just your singing, it’s your tangents when you get particularly passionate about certain topics. how you growl like an angry puppy whenever you get frustrated, even if 99% of the time it’s at me.” haechan murmured, voice lowering itself a few octaves. he reached to renjun’s navel, hands running up his thighs. “i love your singing a lot. it’s not fair you’re so talented.” </p><p>“haechan.” renjun shivered, gripping the bedsheets under them. “are these distractions or… or are you just listing what you like about me?” </p><p>haechan laughed a little, looking up at renjun from his position between his legs. “both?” he lightly ran a thumb over renjun’s hipbone. “i think i just like embarrassing you by talking excessively about how happy you make me.” </p><p>renjun could hear the fondness in haechan’s voice, practically dripping from his tone; it was a particular fondness he noticed that was mainly used with him. he shivered again, unable to help the overwhelming feelings he was currently having the more haechan kept talking. he didn’t know how to handle it and haechan knew that all too well. </p><p>“you should know how much i adore you. why i adore you the way i do. it’s the same reason why i’m even here right now with you, butt-ass naked.” haechan kissed the inside of renjun’s thigh, gently gnawing at the skin afterwards in thought before speaking more,“i mean, god, renjun, i’m about to be inside of you for crying out loud—“</p><p>“okay! okay, got it.” renjun slapped a hand over haechan’s mouth to stop him from continuing on any further with the point he was trying to get across. he always had such a… poetic way with words, especially in the bedroom. “just… wow.”</p><p>“wow what?” </p><p>“i didn’t know you focused on those things.” </p><p>haechan gave him a funny look; it was one that said are you stupid? renjun shrunk deeper into the mattress as haechan came back up to face renjun, hand cupping renjun’s cheek and pinching it in an almost scolding manner. “and that’s surprising? i’m not here for just the sex, renjun.” </p><p>renjun’s eyes widened. “that’s not what i’m saying! i know you aren’t.” </p><p>haechan’s face twisted in irritation despite renjun’s reassurance. the words seem to come out of one ear and right through another, his own sense of hearing becoming deaf at the moment he realized renjun wasn’t confident in haechan’s view on him. and it wasn’t purely anger directed towards renjun and no bone in him ever really carried genuine anger for renjun; it was more-so the feeling that haechan wasn’t doing enough. right now was a perfect indication and slap in the face for him to come to terms with the fact that neither of them were reassured enough of what they were. as true gen z would say, what are we? </p><p>“i really like you.” haechan had told renjun then in the humid practice room, renjun’s head pressed close to haechan’s neck while silent tears threatened to trail down his face. tears that could have masked themselves in his heavy sweat and haechan would have still caught on to. those words he had repeated to renjun that same night after staying in renjun’s room while the older traced the constellation of moles on his face and neck. the second time which had much more of an affect in the dead of the night with silence surrounding them and haechan hugging one of renjun’s many moomin plushies. renjun’s breath had hitched loud and haechan would have mistaken it for a choke hadn’t renjun grabbed and  tossed away moomin and replaced it with himself wrapped in haechan’s warm embrace, lips crashing into the other boy’s. those words that repeated themselves like a broken record in renjun’s head almost everyday since the day they were first spoken because it brought him an embarrassing amount of euphoria. </p><p>“i really love you.” haechan now said. </p><p>his grip on renjun’s face was a little too tight, words coming out like it was something haechan was craving to say for a long time which couldn’t be any closer to the truth. those words lingered in the air, drifted for a little bit while renjun let them slowly sink in. he flinched as he felt wetness plop on his cheek and trickle down the curve of it in a steady stream, reaching the corner of his mouth. it was salty. another droplet accompanied it and before he knew it haechan was crying.</p><p>“you— i’m—“ renjun choked out finally, reality finally hitting him all at once. “you said it.” </p><p>haechan sniffled, looking away. “one of us had to finally spit it out.” he hiccuped out. </p><p>renjun’s expression softened at that and he quickly reached up and wiped away haechan’s tears with the pads of his thumbs. “haechan, look at me.” he eased soothingly, gently pushing his head to him. </p><p>haechan did.</p><p>renjun kept composed. for both their sake’s, but it was difficult to do so with haechan’s expression. he felt his own hands shaking in an immense tremor. “i love you too. so much. i’m so happy you said it. so fucking happy.” he craned his neck, giving haechan’s cheek a wet kiss. haechan hiccuped. </p><p>“i love you. i love you, i love you, i love you.” renjun repeated, each word punctuated with kisses. he hadn’t realized his own tears were falling until he heard haechan suddenly giggle and move his head away. </p><p>“you’re crying now.” haechan whined despite the small smile on his face. “over me?” </p><p>“remember that one time i said i cried during our first win because i saw you crying? yeah, that still applies.” renjun huffed out as he used the back of his hands to wipe at his eyes. </p><p>haechan tittered. “i know.” he reassured. “i know when you’re lying. when you say things like that, i know it’s raw and true. one reason out of the millions as to why i love you.” </p><p>renjun moved his hands to grasp at his ears which were probably beet red at that point. haechan’s chuckle turned into a fuller laugh. </p><p>“we only just now seriously said i love you for the first time ever and you’re already embarrassed?!” haechan almost yelled, hands looping under renjun’s back. with a grunt of effort he pulled them back so they were sitting up, renjun settled on his lap. “the moment was so good. movie scene material! now it’s gone so quickly.” </p><p>renjun held onto haechan’s shoulders at the sudden change of position, eyebrows raised. “it’s not in our nature to be serious for too long. seeing you cry is too painful, anyways. do you like bringing me pain?” </p><p>haechan quirked a brow, sly smirk slowly forming on his lips.</p><p>“oh my god, see. proving my point.” renjun scrunched his face at that. “you crybaby.” </p><p>haechan mimicked renjun and the older pinched his lips shut before he continued to wipe at haechan’s cheeks. he was compliant now and renjun took the chance to delve into a chaste kiss. he pulled apart slightly, the tips of their noses still brushing. renjun couldn’t help the breathy laugh that came out of him at the sight of haechan’s closed eyes, his thick lips still pursed as if silently asking for more.</p><p>“i can’t believe you’re still hard.” renjun whispered. haechan suddenly threw his head back, laughter erupting from him.</p><p>“it went away when i was crying but now that you’re on me it’s obviously gonna come back.” haechan wailed, shaking renjun by the shoulders. “doesn’t that also show you how much i love you? looking at you, it makes haechan jr happy too.” </p><p>“i seriously hate that you call your penis that.” renjun twisted his face in disgust, though he leaned down and grabbed the condom that was still beside them. using his teeth, he tore at the packaging and pulled out the condom. </p><p>“haechan jr, come here.” renjun next said as he scooted back enough so he could roll the slick condom onto haechan’s cock. due to his quick movements, haechan was given no time to laugh at renjun’s hypocrisy and the laugh that came out of him was more like a whine than anything else. he hadn’t even realized renjun was already working his fingers into the condom packaging as if fingering it, a couple slicked fingers revealing themselves and disappearing behind his back. </p><p>“this is like barely anything, but its the best we’ll get right now.” renjun spoke his thoughts outloud, not realizing he was. he used his free hand to support himself on haechan’s shoulder, but haechan leaned in closer till renjun had his arm hooked around his neck, his torso leaning heavily on haechan while his lubed fingers pressed against the ring of muscle. </p><p>“take it easy. we don’t have to rush and the last thing i want is for you to hurt yourself.” haechan placed his hand on renjun’s waist to support him as he urged a finger inside himself. he felt the tension in renjun’s grip on him tighten once he was knuckle deep and he took the opportunity to press his mouth against renjun’s collarbone to provide him with some sort of distraction that would lessen his focus on any pain. </p><p>when it came to his second finger, renjun curled them both, spreading them apart and moving them as much as he could to stretch himself out. he shuddered as haechan moved down to roll the tip of his tongue along his nipple, easing it into a hard nub. at that, he glanced down at haechan, the sight below him momentarily distracting him from his own movements. </p><p>“hyuck…” renjun sighed out, entangling his fingers in haechan’s damp hair. it wasn’t necessarily to grab his attention, otherwise he would have made himself sound a little more demanding, but seeing the small tilt of haechan’s head as he provided a curious glance up at the older anyways was comforting. </p><p>“i know you can do another finger, jun.” haechan encouraged, reaching back his other hand which was used to support up the both of them, taking purchase on the soft flesh of renjun’s ass. he pulled apart his cheeks, chuckling softly at the small “ah” that came from renjun. “can’t you?” </p><p>renjun nodded quickly. he arched his back more just to be able to angle his wrist better to slide in said third finger. once his middle digit was nestled inside him, he felt his knees start to wobble from straddling haechan’s thighs. despite the already rising burn in his legs, renjun moved his fingers around until he felt loose enough to be able to handle haechan’s cock. he swallowed back a cry as he felt his finger tips brush his prostate, but the desperate part of his brain urged him to continue on, just to feel the push that he was craving so badly. sparks shattered his own vision and he leaned down to press into haechan’s neck. </p><p>“a little more.” haechan kept one hand opening renjun up and instead occupied his other by grabbing renjun’s wrist and tugging at it until his fingers were slipping out of him. renjun tensed more as haechan pushed his own fingers back inside of him, repeating the pattern until renjun allowed himself to be carelessly vocal for the first time that night. </p><p>he whined loudly as haechan pushed hard enough each time to rock his body, haechan acting as their main support as he sat firmly for the both of them to stay upright. any ounce of pain or discomfort renjun had previously felt was washed away with the uttermost pleasure, though ultimately his fingers compared to nothing when it came to haechan’s cock. it was almost unsatisfying in a way, but renjun couldn’t help the noises tumbling from his lips anyways. </p><p>“haechan, i-i think i’m good—“ renjun gasped at his quickly rising build up. he lifted himself back up and tossed his head back while vocalizing rhythmic oh’s each time haechan pushed his fingers back inside him, his efforts becoming progressively harsher. “i feel like i’ll come j-just like this, n-no...” </p><p>at that, haechan immediately halted himself before he could thrust renjun’s fingers back inside him. he instead guided them out, renjun seething through gritted teeth at the painful emptiness that followed. </p><p>“babe, stay with me.” haechan soothed, hands returning to renjun’s waist. “you wanna try it like this?” he asked before he pushed his cock into renjun’s gaping hole, the sudden realization of them trying their current position for the first time hitting him. they usually were pretty basic with their positions considering how they never had time to explore new ones with such constricting schedules, but it didn’t bother the two of them, really. </p><p>“yeah, just, i might need help. my legs are sore.” renjun panted, sitting up straight and holding onto haechan’s shoulders with both hands. “please, i want you. it hurts, hyuck.” he pleaded, sounding a little too desperate for his own liking. knowing haechan, it probably only fueled the fire brewing inside him. renjun couldn’t find himself feeling shameful at the moment. </p><p>“okay, baby. okay, okay.” haechan complied, kissing renjun open mouthed. he swallowed down the moan from renjun once he pushed the smaller male down onto his cock, the older sliding down onto it rather easily. before the two of them knew it, renjun was sitting flush on haechan’s lap, taking in every inch of him.</p><p>renjun almost choked at how deep haechan was in such a short amount of time. they hadn’t even started actually fucking and renjun felt overwhelming full. he lolled his head back, taking a moment to adjust to the foreign position. he felt everything straight in his gut. </p><p>“donghyuck.” renjun breathlessly said, rolling his hips a bit. “god, you’re so deep.” </p><p>haechan smirked at that, smoothing his hands along renjun’s body. “is it too much?” he asked, noticing the tremble coursing through renjun under his palms. he wasn’t moving yet, he never liked to start initiating unless renjun told him he was comfortable. it never was his place to tell renjun to relax, even during the first time they had sex. despite their constant banter and constant petty fights, patience was the one thing that got them through a lot of things. </p><p>“no. it feels good.” renjun almost whispered, trying not to come out whiney again. he looked back down at haechan, meeting gazes with him as he lifted himself up till only haechan’s head was inside of him before steadily sitting back down. he laughed quietly at the pleasure drawn on haechan’s face as he built his rhythm, brushing back his post shower hair so it wasn’t splayed across his face. then, he added, “it’s always good with you .” </p><p>haechan smiled at that, leaning into renjun’s touch as he ran his hand through his hair, disregarding the other hand that pushed on him everytime renjun lifted himself. he gave renjun extra support, lifting the smaller male by his waist everytime he rose, handle firm. </p><p>“you look so pretty, jun. this might be my favorite position now.” haechan inhaled sharply, trying to keep composed. </p><p>and it wasn’t an exaggeration. the current lighting due to the darkness and moonlight made his skin appear like smooth porcelain, and his slender body was arching itself prettily as he made haechan feel every part of him. renjun had always had a fluid gracefulness during their dance practices which was built on years of ballet, and it especially shone through in the bedroom. his hips were always moving, especially during the point of just before his climax when he would meet haechan halfway during each thrust. he knew his own body well and if an angle wasn’t satisfying him, he would know the correct way to position himself so the sex wasn’t one sided. and now, especially since renjun had all the reins to pleasure himself, haechan found it especially attractive. </p><p>renjun pressed his forehead against haechan’s, feeling how hot his skin was. he opened his mouth to say something, but haechan’s nails were gently scraping along the expanse of his back, the feather like touch sending goosebumps prickling across his skin. he lost a bit of his finesse as haechan’s hands traced down his thighs and he held onto haechan tighter. </p><p>“fuck, you’re so hot.” haechan moaned as renjun completely sat down on his lap again, this time taking initiative to grind his hips down in a figure eight pattern. his nails scraped a little harsher, breaking the skin a little bit, but renjun couldn’t feel it what with each new stronger wave of pleasure hitting him anytime he made a slight adjustment to his self induced thrusts. </p><p>“hyuck, hyuck.” renjun chanted, giving haechan a shaky kiss threaded in the midst of it. his thighs were on fire and he wasn’t sure how long he could keep going with being on top. if it was under different circumstances where they didn’t spend a whole day running through the beach, renjun would have committed for longer than a few minutes. </p><p>“donghyuckie, my legs hurt.” renjun finally murmured against haechan’s lips, though his hips were relentless in their movements as he rolled against haechan’s hips. “i’m sorry, i’m weak.” he half jokingly said. </p><p>haechan have a breathy laugh at that, sounding a little strained since renjun was still continuing on. “you’re okay. i got you.” he reassuringly said, kissing the corner of renjun’s mouth. slowly, haechan lifted renjun by the hips till his cock was out of him and now laying heavily on his stomach. renjun flopped down back on the bed, immediately reaching towards haechan with grabby hands. haechan’s heart ached.</p><p>“come to hyungie.” renjun teased. his face brightened up more as haechan crawled over him, taking the younger male’s face into his palms. they kissed for a few moments before haechan was slipping back inside him easily, a high moan coming from renjun. </p><p>“cute.” haechan spoke against renjun’s jawline, suckling just below it. he started to rock his hips into renjun steadily, careful and making sure renjun was comfortable. their current position was usually the one they used anyways, but haechan could never shake away the worry that ate the back of his mind of ever accidentally bringing renjun any sort of pain, even if it was minor. once renjun’s legs crossed across the small of haechan’s back and drew him deeper inside, he took that silent action as affirmation to keep going.</p><p>renjun’s hands occupied themselves by touching every inch of haechan he could reach, either by running them along the knobs of his spine and bulged shoulder blades or copying haechan by pressing his nails against his skin and dragging. he tried to refrain from puncturing his actual skin because even if haechan was willing to risk a few marks, renjun was always the more paranoid of the two. a hickey or two was an easy cover up, red scratches not so much.</p><p>renjun turned his head as haechan kept ironically biting and sucking at his neck, but he was far too gone to tell him to quit it. he held the back of haechan’s head, urging his hips to go a little harder, maybe a little faster. he understood the intimate moment that haechan wanted to achieve with their deep rooted confession and renjun wanted nothing more than that too, but the deepness wasn’t the same as it was a position ago. </p><p>“fuck me harder.” renjun blatantly said, though the whisper in his voice made it seem less of a command and more of a plead. he pressed a warm hand on the nape of haechan’s neck and gripped gently, feeling the shiver that coursed through his body at both the touch and words. </p><p>haechan swallowed, renjun hearing it despite him not realizing. without wasting another second, haechan suddenly snapped his hips up, harshness not being what renjun was expecting from him at the moment despite him asking for it, but the moan he let out was indication enough it was what he craved. his pace continued to be slow, but quickened a bit as haechan jerked deeper into renjun. with every jerk, it pushed renjun higher up on the bed, the smaller of the two stuttering out whimpers at the force. </p><p>“moan, renjunnie.” haechan suddenly muttered against the shell of renjun’s ear. “i wanna hear the noises you make.” </p><p>renjun gasped at that, squeezing his eyes shut as haechan nipped at the juncture between his neck and shoulder. he was already finding it hard to stay quiet ever since his laugh attack prior to now, every small moan and whimper already sounding too loud to his own ears. right after that thought, haechan bit harder and coupled it with another snap of his hips, causing renjun to cry out.</p><p>“you’re so pretty, fuck, renjun.” haechan said reverently, feeling renjun’s legs open up more beneath him. “so gorgeous. my pretty baby. i love you so much.” </p><p>renjun couldn’t help the burn in his eyes, unsure if it was from haechan’s constant praising or relentless thrusting. whatever it was, renjun wiped at his eyes with the back of his hand, whining louder and louder. everything felt caught in his rib cage all of a sudden, heavy in his chest and weighing on his heart. it was confusing, but renjun hoped it was just the harsh stimulation attacking him.</p><p>“donghyuck, it feels good.” renjun rather dumbly said, trying his best to form an elegant thought and return the praise, but everything was becoming hard to focus on. he huffed, not helping the wave of a sob that rose in his throat. “you’re pretty too. so pretty— ah, shit.” </p><p>haechan was dimly aware of renjun’s state up until he spoke with a broken voice, raising his head from its position against renjun’s neck. he immediately slowed down to a halt, holding the side of renjun’s face with a panicked look. “hey, what happened? whats wrong?” </p><p>“im okay, nothing’s wrong.” renjun gave a wet laugh, though his face contorted into another sob, not sure what was happening with himself either. everything felt overwhelming and thick and new, but all in the right ways. “i think im just having a second wave.” </p><p>haechan cocked his head to the side, similarly to how a confused puppy would at an unfamiliar action. somehow that made renjun sob more.</p><p>“oh my god— shit, renjun, please, if i did something—“ </p><p>“no, no.” renjun quickly cut haechan off before he could start to begin falsely thinking whatever was happening was his own doing. he placed his hands over haechan’s, squeezing them in consolation. “i just…” </p><p>haechan’s brows were knitted together in worry. renjun wanted to smooth the wrinkles in his forehead that resulted from it with his fingers. </p><p>“in moments like at the beach, in the shower, when we were tickling each other, and right now,” renjun’s adam’s apple bobbed as he gulped down a lump in his throat,”it makes me realize all your gestures show how much you love me, without needing to say the words.” </p><p>thankfully, haechan’s worried look relaxed at the moment he realized that nothing was truly wrong. the canyons that formed in his young face smoother back down and the fondest look renjun had ever seen haechan give him was painted on his face. </p><p>“renjun, you’re a sap.” haechan brushed his thumb beneath renjun’s eyes, this time wiping his tears. “i thought i hurt you.” </p><p>renjun smiled, shaking his head. “still wrapping my head around things. i’m gonna be like this for the rest of the week, probably.” </p><p>haechan allowed renjun to take one of his hands and intertwined their fingers together. it resided next to renjun’s head, most of haechan’s weight pressing down on it since it was keeping him braced. but renjun squeezed it back tight, not minding the pressure. he seemed intent on keeping their fingers locked from then on out. </p><p>“that’s okay, it’s no rush. i’ll be the same. but i’ll also be here to remind you that it’s reality.” haechan murmured, wiping the last of renjun’s tears away with his free hand. “i’ll repeat the words until you get sick of me saying them.” </p><p>renjun rolled his eyes playfully. “let’s keep saying them to make up for the past months of us dating and saying we only “like” each other.” </p><p>haechan’s eyes seemed to twinkle at that in return. “okay.” </p><p>without warning, haechan thrusted into renjun, this time using his hand to hold his neglected cock that was oozing precome. renjun groaned, gaze still fixated on haechan even as he dug his thumb into the slit, copying renjun’s actions in the shower. a slight thought protruded in his mind of it being subtle karma, but it washed away as soon as haechan whispered that he loved him again. </p><p>“i wanted to say it the first time we had sex.” haechan followed afterwards, gaze flickering from renjun’s cock to back to renjun’s half lidded eyes. “even though the sex was terrible because we both didn’t know what to do. i came in like two minutes and you were in pain for a majority of it. but when you told me it was okay and you weren’t mad, i wanted to say it.” </p><p>renjun’s hair was beginning to brush against the headboard, each thrust inching him closer and closer to the top of the bed. he hooked his arm under haechan, grappling onto his shoulder blade to keep him in place. his heart thrummed rapidly. </p><p>“when i kissed you for the first time when i visited you at the radio station.” haechan drawled on, feeling heat flash throughout his body and coil in his stomach. he saw his knuckles turning white in renjun’s grip. “you were so happy i was there to take you to get dinner. i was trying only to hug you, but it was fucking impossible to limit myself to that when i spent years dreaming of kissing you. the look you had on your face after i did, i almost said it then and there too.” </p><p>renjun sobbed once more, despite having just calmed down. he could hear it in the strain in haechan’s voice that he was getting close, but renjun didn’t want him to stop talking. he grinded his hips down at each point haechan thrusted, the loud slap of his thighs meeting his ass filling their hotel room. </p><p>“i— ah, fuck!” haechan grinded his teeth at renjun, losing all verbal clarity. he momentarily let go of renjun’s cock to support himself as he quickened his pace, all finesse long gone. renjun collected haechan into the crook of his neck as he froze up during his orgasm, a hard tremor racking his body as he cried out. </p><p>renjun slid his hands down haechan’s back, letting him ride out his orgasm till he was calmed down, his body exhausting itself. “i have you, i’m here.” he spoke softly into haechan’s hair despite his own desperation to come eating away at him. he pushed the thoughts away, focusing on his first priority which was haechan coming back to the surface. “come back to me, baby.” </p><p>haechan lifted his head, nosing along renjun’s cheek. he wordlessly gave him a kiss before grabbing his abandoned cock once again, pumping it quickly as he did before while working his hips into renjun. it felt rather gross with the condom filled, but he wasn’t about to let renjun have a shitty orgasm. </p><p>“ah, haechan, haechan— it’s okay—“ renjun tried to stop him, unsure how he was even able to keep going immediately after coming down from his intense orgasm. he tried to push him away, but haechan was firmly positioned and the building up to his climax was making renjun weaker and weaker. </p><p>“it’s okay, i have you now.” haechan shushed, voice wrecked and  face contorted as he tried to ignore the overstimulation. it felt like torture, but that was probably because haechan had never felt what it was like to be overstimulated until now. “come for me, renjun.” </p><p>renjun nodded desperately, clawing at haechan’s back and holding him close. the knot that had been in his stomach was so close to unraveling, merely a few more strokes away before he could finally release. he fucked helplessly into haechan’s hand, hips stuttering as he used what little remaining energy he had left. his throat was growing hoarse as well which he knew would come to bite him in the ass when they had their next tour stop. </p><p>haechan opened his palm and rolled the surface of it along the head of renjun’s cock, abusing the tip in rounded motions until renjun’s haze reached its brink. renjun cried out and arched clean off the bed, coming all over haechan’s hand and onto each of their stomachs. renjun panted harshly against haechan’s shoulder, holding onto him tight as haechan milked him till his cock was completely soft. </p><p>once he recovered from the intensity, he heard haechan mumble a warning that he was pulling out. once he did, renjun twitched at the ache that followed and he heard haechan whimper. </p><p>“oh, baby, dont touch it.” renjun slumped back against the bed as haechan lounged back on his knees. he was exhausted and sore, but he managed to find the last bit of burnt out adrenaline within him and used it to get up and retrieve a wet towel. haechan was always the one to clean up post sex because he was always more energized afterwards, but renjun didn’t want him to always feel obligated to do so. </p><p>when he settled back on the bed, there was a comfortable silence, save for renjun’s tired “let me clean you up”. haechan jumped a bit as renjun peeled off the condom and tied it, immediately tossing it in their garbage. he then used the warm towel to gently wipe away at haechan’s cock and stomach, making quick movements so not to stimulate haechan more. he apologized as haechan whined when he wiped his clock head, providing him comforting kisses as well to his shoulders and neck. </p><p>after renjun swatted away haechan’s hands as he futilely tried to take the towel away to exchange the favor, he cleaned himself quickly and tossed the towel into a clothes basket by the bathroom doorway. </p><p>“thank you.” haechan said. then, with tired limbs, he slid off the bed while holding onto renjun’s hands, urging the other boy to come into the other, not soiled bed. once the two were under the covers, haechan curled into renjun, making himself shrink as he tucked his head under renjun’s chin. </p><p>“final thoughts?” haechan suddenly quizzed. a smile was evident in his voice. </p><p>“is this a yelp review?” renjun chuckled, voice rough. </p><p>“hmmm. yeah.” </p><p>“6 star out of 5. i got great sex and a boyfriend who said i love you for the first time.” renjun concluded after a thoughtful hum.</p><p>haechan kissed renjun’s jawline, peering up at him. “yeah? i agree with that rating.” </p><p>renjun massaged haechan’s muscles, easing whatever remaining tension he had lingering within him. “hey, also.” he said, scooting down so he was eye-level with haechan. “let’s sneak out to the beach at one point before we leave.” </p><p>haechan raised a brow, but the sly smile on his face exposed his liking for the idea. especially with the word “sneak” involved. “that’s random, why?” </p><p>renjun shrugged. “i want to go to the beach with you without cameras filming. want to hold your hand and kiss you without worrying about them.” he sighed, but it sounded more like a longing, hopeful one. “i want to keep making happy memories with you. especially now to further commemorate this moment.” </p><p>the sly smile on haechan’s face changed slightly, a little more sweeter now rather than mischievous. he was facing towards the window in their bedroom, where the cool lighting from the night sky was pouring through enough to illuminate his features. he was gorgeous. he looked tired out, sweat still shining on his skin, lips a little chapped from thirst, but he was stunning nonetheless. renjun made it a promise to himself to remind him more often, even if haechan would probably quip back with a conceited comment. renjun would know he was masking his embarrassment, just like he liked to do. as much as the two didn’t like to be serious, he hoped for them to lose that fragile mindset. listening to haechan pour his heart out was something he could tell was weighing him down for so long, especially if it stemmed from their first kiss. renjun brushed back haechan’s bangs to further take in his eyes.</p><p>“tomorrow night.” haechan promised, urging renjun to him by the waist. “we’ll do just that, baby. i’ll make it special.” </p><p>renjun’s eyes crinkled adoringly at the corners, expression blossoming. he wasn’t sure if it was possible for him to love haechan more than he already did, but he currently was feeling like he could. knowing he could express it without feeling like he had to hide it, renjun realized now that he couldn’t live without haechan in his life; as a friend, group member, or a boyfriend. it was a little terrifying, but seeing haechan’s expression every time he looked at him, even if he wasn’t thinking about anything, it reminded renjun that things would be okay. haechan loved him and he loved him in return, that was what mattered. </p><p>“of course you will.” renjun finally responded, tracing the moles on haechan’s face with the pad of his index finger. “you always do.”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>i love reading comments it motivates me to write more since this is the first time i’ve written since like summer of last year 🥺</p><p>also my very first nct writing!! i got into them last october (making them my second kpop male group after bts) and my immediate biases were renjun and haechan. of course i ended up writing a fanfiction about them hahaha</p></blockquote></div></div>
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